Heavy Deodorant
[scale says I've gained 5 pounds] Me: It's probably just what I'm wearing. Wife: You're naked. Me: Wife: Me:
It's a heavy deodorant.
[scale says I've gained 5 pounds] Me: It's probably just what I'm wearing. Wife: You're naked. Me: Wife: Me:
It's a heavy deodorant.
My son asked me why I quit my new job as a professional elevator operator after only one afternoon.
I asked the shopping cart why it kept wandering off on its own in the parking lot.
When you're a kid, blowing out birthday candles is the most exciting moment of the year. You close your eyes, make a wish, and feel like magic is real. When you're in your forties, you close your eyes, take a deep breath, and...
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