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Hat Humor

There are two hats on a hanger... The broken one says to the other:

Falling Down

I wrote a book about falling down the stairs, properly.

7 Stupid Questions That Prove Your Middle School Guidance Counselor Was A Liar

We have all heard the motivational posters hanging in middle school hallways. You know the ones: a majestic eagle soaring over a mountain range with a ...

The Stick Shift

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?

Farmyard Intelligence

What's the smartest animal on the farm?

The Eraser Philosophy

I named my eraser Confidence.

The Procrastinator's Resolution

My new year's resolution is to stop procrastinating.

The Mallard's Tab

Duck walks into a pharmacy and asks for some lip balm. "Certainly sir, will that be cash or credit?"

Condiment Confusion

For those who don't speak Spanish:

The Long Game

Did you hear about the $3,000,000 Maryland State Lottery?

The High Stakes Laundry Negotiation

My wife asked why I was standing in the laundry room staring intensely at my favorite sweater for ten minutes without moving.

A Terminal Case of Confusion

I hate traveling. My wife asked me to book a flight that was 'truly unforgettable.' I managed to find a ticket with a twelve-hour layover in a tiny airport that only has one vending machine and a broken rocking chair.

Botox and humps: 20 camels disqualified from beauty pageant for cosmetic surgery scandal

Forget the influencers on Instagram filters or the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. The true drama of the cosmetic surgery world has officially moved ...

Tied Up in Knots

Why were the sneakers so sad?

Law and Order: Blonde Edition

What do you call a policeman with blonde hair?

The Wandering Nun

What do you call a nun sleep walking?

A Chilly Lineage

If Frieza is King Cold's son...

The Magician vs The Lobbyist

What's the difference between David Blaine and the NRA?